his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
They are going to name an STD after you.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
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