The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
