She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
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I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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