sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
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She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
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