Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
