Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
My dick has a subreddit
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
