I like my sex mixed with concussions.
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
