there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize