i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I hope mine doesn't look like that
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
