New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize