I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
FUCK WHALES
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
