But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
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Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize