I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
