I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
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He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
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He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
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