Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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