Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
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as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
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according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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