It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
