My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
they're reeeeeally big trays
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap