Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
