What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
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