some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
