$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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