she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
zippers are such a cool invention
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
