bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
15 Things That Could NEVER Happen Anywhere But the South
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
15 Times “Flight of the Conchords” Made You Feel Better About Being a Twenty-Something
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.