I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Randomize
