Don't you send me to vm
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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