Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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