i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Someone shit on the floor
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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