you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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