lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch