Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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