Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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