she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
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