chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Randomize