Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize