You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Randomize
