Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
