the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
