dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
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