i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize