life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
