I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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