btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
