I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Say something about gay babies.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
