i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Randomize