he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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