Three words: puerto rican gang bang
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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