Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Randomize
