Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
