Texts From Last Night

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  (310): View more from California

  first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona

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  (310): first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona http://tfl.nu/f4h4
  Replies (16) Good night (897) Bad night (2180)
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  (408): View more from California

  sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds

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  (408): sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds http://tfl.nu/sr5n
  Replies (38) Good night (4839) Bad night (1146)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.

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  (309): I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season. http://tfl.nu/pxkc
  Replies (14) Good night (3603) Bad night (1249)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm

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  (678): in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm http://tfl.nu/30ts
  Replies (3) Good night (1970) Bad night (1110)
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.

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  (479): Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs. http://tfl.nu/zkx1
  Replies (13) Good night (2978) Bad night (2270)
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  (980): View more from North Carolina

  Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"

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  (980): Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened" http://tfl.nu/41rs
  Replies (12) Good night (3297) Bad night (971)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.

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  (917): He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman. http://tfl.nu/emjq
  Replies (5) Good night (2842) Bad night (804)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.

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  (205): Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah. http://tfl.nu/ja8i
  Replies (10) Good night (2641) Bad night (603)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.

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  (210): I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them. http://tfl.nu/a4vh
  Replies (9) Good night (660) Bad night (843)
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  (623): View more from Arizona

  I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.

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  (623): I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about. http://tfl.nu/u0ol
  Replies (1) Good night (918) Bad night (948)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?

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  (508): i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now? http://tfl.nu/8a2l
  Replies (8) Good night (1556) Bad night (523)
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  (925): View more from California

  michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.

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  (925): michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him. http://tfl.nu/5r7o
  Replies (2) Good night (1059) Bad night (487)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.

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  (708): I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures. http://tfl.nu/74dn
  Replies (3) Good night (1150) Bad night (956)
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  (806): View more from Texas

  I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really

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  (806): I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really http://tfl.nu/rgm5
  Replies (4) Good night (666) Bad night (418)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.

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  (815): I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers. http://tfl.nu/2uqi
  Replies (1) Good night (560) Bad night (270)

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